Catch Phrases

And they never cease to disappoint us. The Devils were at it again! The victory over Spurs should now silence the Scousers once and for all about whatever pretences they had towards the Crown of British Football.
Keeping the jovial in mind and after a long long time, I’ll write again on matters pertaining to my life at R. Without any further ado or pretences of my own I present to you, the list of 10 most awesome notices as put up on Bhawan notice boards and duly taken note of by the author. Sit back and enjoy:

1)Notice banning playing football in a hostel:
Intimates of Ravindra Bhawan are advised to not to play footwall inside the bhawan.-Undersigned by the Warden! (Tactful you think?)

2)Notice warning against theft threats:
Thief is all around you! You have given full authority to check any suspense person you find who has stolen something. You can lock them in bathroom too. Any person found suspensely moving in any corridor can be checked. Your safety is in your hands. (WTF??)

3)Notice asking for some sanity in the bathrooms (Pasted on a bathroom door):
This is bathroom! Behave as literate as you are.

4)Notice regarding PDA:
Couples have been spotted in compromising positions at certain locations in CBRI campus. Henceforth, anyone found moving suspiciously will be punished severely.- The orientation of “couples” was never revealed.

5)Fake death of Chief Warden:
A photo of the warden with phool ki maala around his neck is found one morning, a day before the TS. It is with immense sorrow that we announce the death of Dr. XXX. To solemnly mark the occasion, the test series have been postponed indefinitely.-Black humour.

6)Inter Bhawan Sports:
An inter bhawan “Poshampa Bhai Poshampa” tournament will be organised in front of the main building on the given dates. Interested candidates need not apply.

7)Mess Utensils:
Mess ke bartan jiske paas bhi hon,kripya jaldi se jaldi wapas kar dijiye………and so callously written below it is……”hain. Par nahin doonga!”

8)Vouge Auditions:
Do you think you have what it takes? Do you think you have what it takes? Do you think you have what it takes? Do you think you have what it takes?- Vogue auditions!!
I fell for this!!

9) Pendrive lost:
I lost 4gb pendrive in library. I anyone found it, give it to me. My name is return on it.-contacts followed.

10)Prospective Mess Secretary:
Bored of stale food? Don’t worry, I will provide amlete in mess everyday and sweat will be given to you everyday! Vote for me……


P.S.:Lack of photographic evidence shouldn’t be translated to lack of authenticity.