Immortal Words

If there was one thing I would like to remember about my life at R, it would be, in one word, “awesomeness”. If Morpheus had it his way, awesomeness would have been like Matrix, being everywhere around us. We would eat it, breath it and even shit it! As the following verses will show, my 3 years at R haven’t failed to disappoint me in the verbal sector. Presenting to you the 10 most legendary lines that have been spoken. Lines that have and will stand the test of time:

1) “Skills Raa Re” –Senior Sunki. Although the real name of the speaker isn’t known, this statement makes it to the top on the basis of sheer orgasmic feeling the speaker went through when he saw Yayha Toure rounding a defender and slotting in a goal from an acute agle. Legen-wait for it-dary.

2) “Its Hard”- Sunki (The Bulk) revealing his naughty side on being questioned about girls thereby proving once and for all that he isn’t a complete asexual but perversion is his deepest innermost trait.

3) “C’mmon man! Wass going on man! You’re IIT man!”- An exasperated faculty having the most Rajasthani-fake-American accent possible on a student entering late in the class. True Story.

4) “No offence”-Mr. Jugga on being offended. For example: “Jugga you’re a jackass!” will be replied as: “No offence!”

5) “I agree with all my friends here”-Vikash ‘calamity’ Singh during a GD being verbose and displaying remarkable talent and agreeing with both sides of the point at the same time. Genius.

6) “I wonder if a hello is the best way to begin this”- Technically though not a verbatim but it was in said form when I came across it for the first time. MVRM being at his flirtatious best and writing a mail which was more of a guide to his blog mentioned here and here too.

7) “We do and we let it to do”- Udaykiran Edikoju giving a highly technical definition of the difference between Forced Convection and Free Convection. The statement in question brought him full marks whereas other mortals after giving random seemingly more technical phattas were politely asked to screw themselves.

8) “Deepak humaara neta hai, sabka munh mein leta hai!”- Campaign slogan for a guy named Deepak back in my first year makes this the oldest of the entries in this list. Ritu Bahuguna anyone?

9) “Reverse reverse, torque torque, very easy, very easy!”- Another enlightened faculty mocking us with his intelligence on being asked a question about ‘Reverse Torque’. The statement, later as he told us, was supposed to be the answer to the said question. Succinct.

10) “Ni amma”- The latest entry to this list. This is the haddu slang for derogating ‘your mom’. Qualities include being extremely sweet on the ears and if spoken to a haddu bringing a smile rather than a frown to his face!

Oh lord, we pray to thee! Let us be good enough that we may make it to the list sometime soon. Amen!

From The Dark Snows.....

One of the primary reasons I found myself in an unjolly mood throughout my intern was because United, after having a fairytale season lost in an inexplicable manner to Barcelona in the Champions League Final. After having watched that under a bout of the most terrible flu of my life, there definitely has to be some award on the lines of “Survival of the shittest” given to me. The do-all game, atleast for me and the performance had reminded me of the performance of ‘Aap Mujhe Acche Lagne Lage’ at the BO.

That was about three months ago, and yeah I forget to mention your misery has to continue when you find you lose your best player who happens to be the best in the world too and also discover that another player whom you thought to be the most committed was doing a Peter Pettigrew on you. Things certainly did look gloomy!

Crosstown rivals and competitors for the “Bastards of the Premier League” alongwith Chelsea FC, Citeh, meanwhile were scooping up players much like The Bulk. You know, when he sets his sight on something to eat, it usually ends up in his mouth. There isn’t much of an option with anyone.

On top of that you also realise that the hallowed No.7 jersey has been awarded to a player who scored more than two hundred goals for your greatest rivals. But like I said, that was three months ago!

I have just gotten over the complete annihilation of Valencia  CF and that’s saying so when I was just reading the blog version of its live coverage. Berbatov seems untouchable (as in the way nobody else can touch him, but ofcourse you get that!), Macheda with every game  screams, “Pick me gaffer!” and boy oh boy it has to be some day when you contemplate on how actually John O’ Shea is a brilliant asset for the team. Its around 10 days remaining to the start of the season and I have to admit the goosebumps haven’t been this spooky anytime during the past 10 years.

Bring it on Bitches!

Check it out this!

Your life in college, chronologically is much like your infatuation with movies. You start out with excitement and possibly anything that is thrown your way makes you ponder upon it. Then is the next stage wherein you tell yourself your priorities and don’t go universal. By the end of third stage you are practically a veteran and more or less have experience on your side to guide other people even if in your yonder years you had turned a nought yourself (Notice the alliteration). The current stage is what exactly would be called niche art. Precisely why that cinema is so boring, I get the hang of it now. That would pretty much describe an average fourth year in an engineering college.

Some (that would be me) would also say: Life in college, chronologically is like your taste in porn. Though it would be apt here to point out that though the argument is less politically correct, it is a more accurate analogy.

Not having a football season around too adds boredom and of course you start missing your seniors and realise that you really don’t know anyone in your own college apart from your classmates because apparently, for a junior, you are nothing more than a Basilisk. Only in this case he isn’t killed, rather propelled to the administration ready to cut your throat to return your stare. The other day I saw a fellow fourth year cajoled out of a Table Tennis table by a mere glare of “Bhaiya!”

Of course, the above droning, like most of my theories comes a cropper in real life. People here, even of you aren’t acquainted with them, remain as awesome as ever. With time running out, the official guide to awesomeness “100 Most Awesome People of the Insti You Must Meet”, is being prepared. Safe here to say that mah experiences play in important part in deciding who is worth your time and who isn’t. People into super-kewl blogging have just entered the race with one blogger claiming he has a crush on a professor (the professor in question is male and so is the blogger by the way) and the other claiming he wants to kill a batchmate whenever he sees her, that in turn because he loves her.

The faculty isn’t far behind either where candidate qualities include a heavily Rajasthani fake American accent mixed with the grammar of a dog, Parseltounge and getting yourself on the coverpage of Vogue. The mere thought of meeting such fantabulous, mind blasting personalities at one go could get Paris Hilton wet with anticipation (If you catch my drift!!).

And there you are again, you really aren’t bothered about the status quo, you get out of your room and enjoy these people and your ruminations regarding each day being your last calendar day in the insti takes a back seat. The 101^st seat, I must say.